Langer zonder dan met…

Ik kan me nog herinneren dat ik me besefte dat ik langer met een rijbewijs geleefd had dan zonder. Ik vond dat toen een bizar idee. Zo ook besefte ik me vanmorgen dat mijn broertje vandaag langer zonder dan met mijn moeder geleefd heeft. Ik kan daar gewoon niet helemaal bij. Toen ik hem vroeg hoe dat voor hem was was het (gelukkig) net zo bizar voor hem.

Vandaag is het 17 jaar geleden dat ze is overleden, en ik kan me ieder detail van die dag nog herinneren alsof het vorige week was. Het is nog steeds het allerzwaarste wat ik heb meegemaakt. En ondanks dat het niet zo vaak meer gebeurt, word ik nog steeds wel eens wakker zonder het besef dat ze dood is. Die paar minuten, vlak voordat ik echt wakker ben, zijn erg fijn. In die paar minuten leeft ze nog, is ze bezig in haar tuin, en heb ik nog een vangnet.

Wellicht houdt dat zelf-kwelling op wanneer ik langer leef zonder dan met.

Bound to Tome or Plane

Previously, the heroes returned to the Careless Wanderer after discovering the Book of Woe in the library of the Newport Vault. It did not take long before Epidemius found them in their dreams while in the disguise of father Devon, as he had done before. He made another attempt to convince the heroes to return the book to him.

Seventh Day, Second Ride, Autumn Twilight, 1262

(Silvermoon is waning, Bloodmoon is in low sanction, Darkmoon is waxing)

It was just after eleventh bell when the heroes gathered in Emrys’ luxurious room to discuss their second visitation from Epidemius. In contrast to the snow that was falling on Emrys’ balcony, the room itself was warm and comfortable.

Having come up with an idea of trapping Epidemius in his own Book of Woe, Chakuq asked Luca whether Blackstar was forced into the staff. Luca checked in with Blackstar, who said he went “Willingly, gladly. It was an hour.” It quickly became clear that the knowledge of how to achieve that was known by only a precious few. Blackstar shared that the dwarves of Ard Thoradun were able to transfer a soul into an object, and Luca suggested visiting Dagran Forgewright, the unofficial ambassador to the dwarven thanedom in Kingsport.

An inspection of Maltorius’ spell book gave the heroes the insight that it was filled with variations on one particular necromantic spell. Quentin mused that it may be a spell which is tailored to different subjects, while Luca wondered whether it was not an evolution of the same spell.

The conversation became quite steeped in magical theory and Neamhan started to disassociate from it and decided she wanted to visit Lady Commander Miranda and her griffon Frostfeather. Luca seemed to disapprove of Neamhan’s lack of focus on Epidemius and flippantly pointed to the balcony and suggested she fly out to find Frostfeather. Neamhan did not feel confident enough to ask the Lady Commander for permission, and Astrid took her by the arm and marched her out the door, determined to support Neamhan’s endeavour by taking her to see Lady Commander Miranda.

While Astrid and Neamhan went to the Crownsguard garrison, Emrys, Luca, and Chakuq went to the Circle of Magi, hoping to speak to Réonan about the possibility of trapping Epidemius, and the process that the Senhandrim used to transfer their souls to objects and arms. Chakuq mentioned that the College of Bards might also be a useful source of lore, but decided to wait until later to revisit. In the meantime, Falka would use her connections at the Library of Ioun to see if she could research the rituals used by the Senhadrim from a historical perspective. And lastly, Quentin would make his way to Dr. Arkenward’s to seek guidance.

When Astrid and Neamhan arrived at the garrison they were given quick access to the inner courtyard where Lady Commander Miranda was overseeing the grooming of Frostfeather by the griffon handlers. While Astrid was talking to the commander about the state of the kingdom, Neamhan was observing Frostfeather until her attention was drawn by a woman carrying a baby. She was wearing a dark, cowled robe and sandals, had a slender face and a sickly pale complexion. The woman walked into a guard room and Neamhan followed. The child she held in filthy hands was equally sickly, with a swollen belly and strange black hair growing on the rough skin of its shoulders.

The mother rejected Neamhan’s offer of spare clothing to help keep her and the baby warm. Speaking in an archaic form of High Lyrian, she introduced herself as Virulencia and it became clear that she was the sister of Epidemius. She tried to convince Neamhan to give her the Book of Woe. She would take it away, and she would “take [her] plaguemaidens away.” Virulencia tried to appeal to Neamhan’s sense of motherhood, hugging her own, deformed child closely, suggesting that working with her would save the lives of many of Kingsport’s children. Neamhan was confused and said she had no children, which Virulencia dismissed in a way that left Neamhan somewhat shaken. Virulencia, scorned, quietly retreated and disappeared.

Once Frostfeather was fed Neamhan worked up the courage to ask whether she could hunt with him and the commander consented. Neamhan found a quiet place to transfigure into the wild shape of a peregrine falcon, and the two of them took off. They zoomed across the skies above Kingsport, chasing each other, as well as bullying some of the crownsguard griffon riders.

Luca, Emrys, and Chakuq first made their way to the Correntine ward, where they found the College of Bards. The amphitheatre in front of the large building of the college was empty, which was unusual. Even in the winter students could often be found studying and practicing there, but the weather was simply too cold and bleak for anyone to leave the comfort of the warm halls inside.

The heroes walked the halls of the college and came across students composing, practicing, and debating. When the found Lord Andrew’s luxurious chambers, they found them a mess, with a servant by the name of Mathilde, a stern, older lady who tended to Andrew, tidying up while they spoke with Andrew as he was getting ready to start his day.

Chakuq put the horse-hide book he had retrieved from the Newport library in front of Andrew, who studied it briefly before concluding that the book was written in the ancient language of celestials. The book described how all of creation was a composition of songs, each of which was either in harmony or discord with the rest, and together it made up a symphony. Andrew and Chakuq made a bargain; Andrew would be allowed to study the book, in return for organising an audience with Le Papillon, the infamous headmaster of the college. The heroes hoped that he would be able to shed more light on some of the legends of the Senhadrim.

When Quentin arrived at the Arkenward manse in Old Town, the door was opened by Darla, the curly-haired halfling servant that ran the household. Quentin was welcomed in and was greeted by Vydia in the kitchen of the manse. Vydia could explained that Dr. Arkenward had not been doing well with his recovery due to the curse that Epidemius placed on the city. Despite this, Quentin saw and spoke with Dr. Arkenward about the possibility of Epidemius being bound to an object in order to trap him, or bound to this plane in order to defeat him.

Ocillate

I can’t help but find that I ocillate between a desire for the peaceful seclusion of a forest walk with my dog and the debauchery of a night of abandon in Amsterdam. I can miss both, at the same time; the peace of the rustling of trees and the sound of bumblebees, and the thumping of a bass and chatter of people high on mdma.

Litter, Again

Today I went for a run, and was shocked at the amount of litter I saw in a park. I have spoken about how bad the litter problem is in England (see here, and here), but my dissatisfaction with the situation seems to be growing worse. I spent some time litter picking, as there were bins nearby, and I noticed that the litter consisted of plastic energy drink bottles and discarded fast food containers. Perhaps the people that consume that stuff have so little respect of their own well-being that they cannot be expected to care about their surroundings or the environment.

The Negotiation of Another Unwelcome Dream

Previously, the heroes discovered that Falka had found the Book of Woe in the library of the Newport vault. While searching for the books Neamhan found an interesting text burnt on a piece of bark, Chakuq found a compelling book made of horse hide, and Luca discovered the spellbook of Maltorius, Blackstar’s archnemesis who the staff wanted to vanquish in return for his obedience. When the heroes returned to the Careless Wanderer they found that Ser Croy was waiting for them bearing an invitation, and they were visited by Epidemius, in the disguise of father Devon, once again.

Seventh Day, Second Ride, Autumn Twilight, 1262

(Silvermoon is waning, Bloodmoon is in low sanction, Darkmoon is waxing)

Epidemius sat at the same table as the heroes, cloaked in the disguise of father Devon, as he had done before. It was clear that he was aware the heroes had found and retrieved the Book of Woe, and he was willing to trade with them in order to reacquire it. It did not take long for Quentin to realise that he was dreaming, and soon after the other heroes realised the same; he was once again utilising Pazuzu’s dreamweb to visit them.

Epidemius promised the heroes many things in return for the book; one boon, one question, a promise to not influence the material plane, and to not use the Book of Woe on any mortal. He repeatedly mentioned that the only thing that mattered was “the great desolation” in which everything was consumed, and that demons were his “only adversary.” Luca entertained the idea of striking a deal, emboldened by his recent success in outwitting a minor fiend, but Quentin and Neamhan opposed that musing immediately.

Frustrated, Epidemius stated that waiting for his return on Second Day, Third Ride, Autumn Twilight, 1262 would only bring about hundreds of deaths and ultimately accomplish nothing. Chakuq suppressed his very real fear and walked Epidemius to the door, saw him out, and closed the door behind him.

Once Epidemius had left, Quentin immediately challenged Luca about his willingness to negotiate with the fiend, but the young warlock claimed only to want to keep Epidemius talking in order to gain more information. Chakuq shared a saying from his people that roughly translated to Epidemius being the equivalent of spoiled food; his words were corrupted and offered nothing.

Venting her frustration, Neamhan questioned why the gods would ignore the prayers of their followers and not interfere. Quentin claimed that the gods did intervene in mortal matters, and that his being in Kingsport was a sign of their intervention. Quentin claimed that a small part of the gods could be found in everyone, and they exercised their will through them. Neamhan rejected that idea, and asserted that her magic was her own and not fuelled by the divine.

Neamhan was the first to awaken and found that Ser Croy was asleep in a big chair close to one of the hearths. Epidemius’ dream had already taken them when Quentin had sent the old knight upstairs to sleep in his room it seemed. Lauryn was already awake and preparing the tavern for the day, and Neamhan decided to help out.

Around dawn, all except Emrys woke up. Astrid strolled in, covered in snow, fresh from a trip up the river, ready for breakfast. The banquet that was being organised in Quentin’s honour came up, as did Dame Pauline’s investigations into Quentin’s background. When Quentin suggested that Dame Pauline might only be loyal to his lord father rather than to him, Astrid tried to divorce him of that notion.

“I hope Heimdall graced you with a big cock, Quentin, because he certainly was not generous when he gave you brains.”
– Astrid Sigurðardóttir

By the time that Emrys finally awoke at ninth bell, everyone joined him in his room to discuss the plan to deal with Epidemius. Falka joined for that conversation. Neamhan explained to the others that she was possibly able to bind Epidemius to the mortal plane. Luca suggested that her attempt could be boosted by using one of the lyrium crystals that the heroes still had. Neamhan picked a blue crystal, which would help abjuration magic, and she was keen to grab a dark violet one.

The topic of names came up when Luca suggested knowing Epidemius’ true name would give the heroes power over him. The heroes had learned that Epidemius used to go by the name Epidemiel, before he fell from grace, but they were sceptical that it might actually be his true name. Luca stated that a true name was bestowed upon a being upon drawing its first breath, and that it could not be changed once given. Without that name it was beyond the abilities of the heroes to summon Epidemius.