Stressed Out

I’ve been very stressed out, lately. On all fronts things haven’t been going too smoothly, and while I’ve always been good at separating worlds and not letting stress in one area of my life spill over into another area of my life, I’m afraid I’ve reached a limit to the amount of stress I can comfortably handle. It’s interesting to see what happens to you when under pressure from all sides, the way you change your behaviour and the way you think, how you treat people but mostly how you treat yourself. I’ve always had a relatively healthy dose of self-loathing, which wasn’t really dependent on what other people thought of me. It was always there, and it kept me honest, and it kept me striving. Of late, mostly due to losing some measure of self-control due to stress, my self-loathing has been getting a little stronger, which wreaks havoc to my determination and discipline. Thoughts of radical changes come and go, but an inescapable fact is that the circumstances will, at least for the first time after a radical change, require more of my attention, and thus increase my stress instead of diminish it.

And then I get word from Veed that he’s going to send me a rather cool, belated birthday present, and it makes me realise how lucky I can be, and then I ask myself the question that I keep asking myself in order to put things in perspective; Are you a child-soldier in the Democratic Republic of Congo? Have you had to hack your parents, brothers and sisters apart with a machette in order to prove your worth to the rebels? Are they forcing you to sniff cocaine laced with gunpowder on a daily basis in order to insure your servitude and give you a feeling of invincibility so you can go out and commit heinous crimes against your fellow men? No…then shut up and count your lucky stars.

Bob Ross Master

One of my colleagues and I were invited to an AT5 (local television station) client and suppliers party yesterday. Party isn’t the right word, but what we ended up doing was lots of fun. We went on a large boat, and cruised around the canals and up and down the Amstel river, we ate, we drank, we talked, but mostly, we had a Bob Ross painting course. Now, for those of you who don’t know who Bob Ross is; leave now, and don’t come back until you do. For those who do; we all got the Bob Ross certified paints (titanium white, Van Dyke brown, etc.) and a bunch of Bob Ross certified brushes and spatchulas (two-inch brush, one-inch brush, fan-brush, etc.) and we were instructed on how to make a nice, scenic, Bob Ross-esque painting. And there were prizes to be had for the top three paintings. Guess who won the first prize? Exactly. Me.

At night we had a Jenever tasting at Hooghoudt on the Reguliersgracht, and had dinner there, too. Had a fascinating conversation with the director of programming of AT5, and the chief editor for the NOS 8 o’clock news about the changing way in which news is reported and how much violence is shown on the news.

I had a really great evening. Oh, my prize? I won a full Bob Ross kit, with an easel, brushes, paints, 3-hour instructional DVD, books, examples, etc. I have no idea what I’m going to do with that. :)

The Terminator

The Terminator [1984]

Director: James Cameron
Actor: Linda Hamilton, Michael Biehn, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Lance Henriksen

The first Terminator film was considered a low-budget film back 1984. I guess that would put it en par with a film like Clerks in this day and age. Regardless, it is a visual masterpiece, with decent acting, and fantastic tension-building. Even the soundtrack, as cheesy and dated as it may sound, fits really well.

Sarah (Hamilton), is a young woman living in L.A., working as a waitress at a restaurant, going out on the weekends and trying to have some fun. One day one of her co-workers calls her over to watch a local news bulletin about a woman with the same name as her having been shot and killed, but she thinks nothing of it. When later that day another Sarah Conner gets murdered, the police starts to investigate in earnest. It’s obvious that the killer is going by the phonebook, eventually getting to all the other Sarah Conners. Just when Sarah realises what’s happening, she is approached by a rather creepy looking guy called Reese (Biehn) who rescues her from a massive guy (Schwartzenegger) who tries to kill her. Reese says he’s from the future and that he’s been sent to 1984 to protect her from what he calls the “Terminator,” a cyborg sent to eliminate Sarah because she’s going to be the mother of John Conner, the leader of the human resistance against the machine overlords of 2020. The chase starts from there as the Terminator relentlessly works towards Sarah’s demise while Reese works diligently to protect her.

Less polished than its sequal, the cool Terminator 2: Judgement Day, but what it lacks in polish, it makes up in grit and atmosphere. Double-thumbs up to this movie.

The Bourne Ultimatum

The Bourne Ultimatum [2007]

Director: Paul Greengrass
Actor: Matt Damon, David Strathairn, Joan Allen, Julia Stiles

The third in the Bourne series, and Jason Bourne (Damon) is has fully taken the fight to his former-employer, the CIA, who are still furiously pursuing him. He’s more determined than ever to find out who he is and ultimately, destroy Treadstone.

For those of you who aren’t familiar with the previous two films, a short recap:

.: The Bourne Identity
In the Bourne Identity, Jason Bourne is found floating unconscious in the Mediterranean by a group of fishermen who rescue him. He doesn’t remember a thing, but with the few items on his person, most notably a small, nearly undetectable implant in his thigh with the access information to an anonymous Swiss bank account, he goes to find out who he is. What he finds is a small bank-vault full of different passports, money and a weapon, all belonging to him. He also discovers that he is capable of incredible physical feats, and has knowledge of weapons, tactics, evasion, espionage and counter-espionage. He just doesn’t know how he came to know all these things.

He meets Marie along the way, who decides to help him find out, and they fall in love. They find that Jason was a member of the ultra-secret Treadstone program, a CIA program of international assassination, where a handful of men were trained to be the most lethal and capable assassins on the planet. Behaviour modification, physical and mental disciplining, development of language, technical and combat skills; the works. When Jason is discovered by Treadstone, they try to take him in for “debriefing.” He resists and gets away and warns Treadstone not to come looking for him.

.: The Bourne Supremacy
In the following film, Jason and Marie are living together in Goa, India, and they keep a low profile, all the while Jason, who only remembers flashes and shards of his former life, tries to piece things together, unable to let go of his past. An assassin comes calling to take out Jason, but takes out Marie instead. Jason, mistakenly, thinks the assassin was sent by Treadstone, and goes to take his revenge. Along the way he gets caught up in an international scandal involving the Russians, and finds out that his first assignment in Treadstone was to kill a Russian diplomat. He retraces the steps of that mission, trying to rekindle the memory, and uncovers more and more dirt on Treadstone and the scandal. Pamela Landy, a hardball CIA director is trying to bring Jason Bourne in, or at least eliminate him because of the danger he poses, and continues to pose, to Treadstone. Jason finds out more about himself, evades Treadstone, exposes corrupt Treadstone officers, and takes down the Russian assassin and his employer, a Russian oil tycoon, finds the child of his first assignment’s victims and apologises. He promises Pamela Landy that if they don’t get off his back, he’s going to bring the fight to them.

.: The Bourne Ultimatum
Project Treadstone has been dismantled and rebuilt in the wake of 9/11 as project Blackbriar. It’s now an even deadlier assassination program that doesn’t need sanction from any politicians or higher ups. Within limits it does what it wants and covers up what it wants, all over the world, having highly trained assassins on retainer in virtually every country.

A British journalist catches wind of this project and finds an ex-Treadstone agent willing to talk about Jason Bourne, the man who started all of it, who was the prototype assassin that proved the project worked, and worked well. The assassin on which all other Treadstone and Blackbriar agents were measured against. He also finds that Jason Bourne has gone rogue, and he writes about it in the paper, trying to expose the CIA’s secret program. Jason reads about it, too, and decides to talk to the journalist, in the hope he can tell him more about who Jason is. (Obviously still struggling with remembering his past.) Meanwhile, Director Vossen, the head of Blackbriar is after the journalist to figure out who he’s been talking to, and gets Pamela Landy involved once they lose the journalist to Bourne.

Vossen is determined to eliminate Bourne, and in trying so crosses the line that Jason drew in the sand at the end of the previous film, and so Jason brings the fight to them, picking them apart agent by agent, trying to get to the ex-Treadstone agent who talked to the journalist. Meanwhile, he’s starting to remember more and more. Pamela Landy figures out that Vossen is abusing his authority, and tries to shut the program down, and gets unexpected help from Jason.

Great film. Great, great film. A really good ending to the trilogy, with a great opening for fans who are hungry for more. The acting is outstanding, of all involved, but especially Damon is king. To quote another review of this film I read; “he’s one of the best actors of his generation.” And I heartily agree.

Paul Greengrass is obviously a talented director. He managed to capture the hecticness of Jason’s flight, the pursuit and the difficult situations he gets himself involved in very well by using Shaky-Cam in The Bourne Supremacy. He took it to another level that was bordering on the annoying in The Bourne Ultimatum. In a sense, it was quite clever; the camera became more unstable the more confusing the situation, the more hectic the fight, or the faster Jason had to think to come up with solutions. But even in situations where he was having a normal conversation – like the diner conversation where Julia Stiles’ character is talking to Jason and she implies that they have a romantic past is slightly rocky and shaky. Perhaps that’s to indicate that Jason is never at rest, and always prepared for trouble, or perhaps it’s just fucking annoying. You choose.

I loved this film, as I loved the previous two films. It has the maturity, realism (sort of, let’s not get started on some of the absolute technical absurdities in the film), grit that James Bond films have lacked (until Casino Royale, and even that was a bit camp.) Jason would kick James’ ass.