Wreckage

Fuck, I’ve been a wreck the last few days. Emotionally drained, tired and miserable. Yesterday I couldn’t go to BJJ because of a pulled muscle in my shoulder that hasn’t been healing well, so I was convinced to go running — something I didn’t really wanted to do but something I thought might get the endorphins flowing and which might make me forget my misery for a while. After about 8 or 9 kilometres I certainly forgot about my emotional misery because I started worrying about my physical misery (somewhere, some Maslovian is grinning at this as they’re hugging their hierarchy of needs poster), but I didn’t feel any better. Went to bed early, slept well and woke up a little calmer, but I can feel it slipping away. Bleh.