Author Archives: Dennis


I’m having some serious second thoughts about the apartment, but I’ve decided that I’m too late in the game to not take it. I’ve got a month’s notice, and I really need to have something. I might be able to stay in the house I’m in right now for another few weeks, perhaps months, but it can be sold at any moment, and I’d rather leave before that happens than have to leave when it does. Sure, sure, I have rights, but the landlord happens to be a good friend of mine and I don’t want to be a bother. We have always handled things regarding his house with the friendship and trust that comes from our relationship, and I don’t want to fuck anything up by being difficult at the last minute. So yeah, I need to have an apartment. My father has been looking at other things, and if he finds something better I’ll definitely switch. But…this means I don’t feel very motivated to start moving, or even to start redecorating the apartment I already have.

Veed and Lin have arrived two days ago, and mostly things have been quiet. I’ve been working so we really only have been spending time during the evenings, and I’ve been so beat that I don’t think I’ve been terribly good company, and hardly a good host. Well, I’m not really “hosting” anything, considering how they’ve been out buying groceries, and doing dishes, and stuff like that. To think that Veed gave up the Roskilde festival for this. *shame*

Today Flak arrives at 17:35, and Tease arrives at 19:50. Then tomorrow Jim arrives at 9:15 while Jan will show up around 9 as well. Orchestrating this many people would be a lot easier if I knew what I would be doing with my apartment. If I’m going to leave it soon, I really don’t want to use it at all. I want to leave it untouched and return it as I got it, but that might simply not be an option.


How the hell can you work at a company for six fucking years and still not know the most rudimentary elements of the system you develop and sell!? How the fuck can you make a mistake that is likely going to cause us tremendous credibility loss, and quite possibly, legal trouble!? How can you sit there and say you didn’t know and pretend like it’s not your fault!?

You asshole!

Apartment & Marco & Weekend

So I got the keys to my new apartment yesterday. Well, “new” ain’t exactly the word I’d use to describe the place. It’s nice enough, but it needs work. I got to see it for the second time, and it really doesn’t look as nice as I remembered it. I really need to get rid of the interior, but I want to store it some place so I can put it back once I leave. It’s really quite horrible – to the point where even the landlord says he’s absolutely cool with me chucking things out; he just wants a furnished apartment back with furniture of at least equal quality. There’s green carpet on the floor that really needs to go. I mean…green carpet

Marco hasn’t really been responding to any of my e-mails lately, and I’m wondering if my leaving is putting him in a position where he’s upset with me. I’ve been asking him over and over if we can make a deal on some of the furniture in the house and he hasn’t replied to even one of my e-mails regarding it. It’s getting to the point where I think I should call him soon. It would be awesome if I could take two or three sticks of furniture and perhaps some kitchen stuff.

The coming week is going to be crazy. Veed (Claus), Lin (Megan), Toryu (Jan), Tease (Lindsay), Flak (Simon) and Big Jim (Jim) are coming over to visit Amsterdam, and with the exception of Jim they’re all staying with me. Heavy D has already been sweet enough to offer up his home from Saturday onward, and Eva has done so, too. But seeing as how she lives in a studio-apartment with her boyfriend, it’s not such a good idea to put people up there. I think it’ll be a combination of my apartment, “Studio de Baars” or my house, “Villa BdV.”

Veed and Lin are coming quite early, on Wednesday, with the rest trickling in on Friday night and Saturday morning. It’s going to be a hell of a weekend.


I suffer from clusterheadaches. If you don’t know what they are, think of the worse migraine you’ve ever had, multiply that by a hundred then you’ve got its intensity. They show up in small clusters, hence the name. The clusters usually last for about one or two weeks for me, in which I’ll have a headache attack about once every two days. For me they don’t last very long, perhaps 30 to 45 minutes, but for others it is known to last up to 3 hours. Sometimes I pass out. If I don’t, I throw up. I haven’t had one in a long time, and for that I’m glad. The first time I had one and where I understood what I was suffering from was in the spring of 2001. My doctor asked me to find out if, as a child, I had suffered headaches like this as well. My mother told me I had spells in which I was nearly unhandlable and crying all the time when I was very young and unable to explain what was wrong. We think that they might have been clusterattacks, too. It goes away for months, sometimes years at a time, and they really don’t know what causes it, nor do they know if there’s a cure. The only thing I have is Immitrex, which is like horse-tranquiliser, that I can administer by pen-injection, but I lost that thing, so I’ve got some pills around. They keep me from passing out, but they make me more nauseous once the pain is gone.

Anyway, while I’ve been actively dealing with that for a few years now, why, oh why can’t I just endure a two day normal, vanilla-icecream, jetlag headache without getting cranky?